Saturday, August 29, 2009

Feeling a little empty

The other day, I finished my supply of prenatal vitamins...and just like that, everything to do with my being pregnant was over. Ever since having Little G I have been weaning myself off pregnancy slowly in different ways. Since I am not breastfeeding, I have been drinking coffee and having a beer or glass of wine every once in a while. I had my last visit at the OB's office and now won't be back for 6 months, rather than make the weekly (at one point almost daily) visits that I was up to prior to having Little G. I packed away the at home doppler kit because there is no other heartbeat inside me to find.

And even though I have the most beautiful, amazing, gorgeous, lovely little boy here in my house, physically...I can't help but miss having him inside me. I feel a little empty. Believe me, this is not a feeling I EVER expected to feel...and yet, it seems to be a strong enough feeling that I am finding myself needing to work through it. Who know's how bad it will be after having our second, and final, child?

Anyway, I don't have any grand conclusion to this and I certainly didn't mean to sound glum...because really, this is just a small feeling...I guess I just felt like putting it out there. I know these feelings will pass...how could they not with this guy around? Clearly while my tummy may feel empty, our lives are full of the wonderfulness that is this guy:







4 comments:

  1. I love the stripey socks in many colors...makes me think of "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat." He can be "Little G and the Amazing Technicolor Stripey Socks." Hope all is well.

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  2. Oh, you look so beautiful in that photo with him!

    I know exactly how you feel. I certainly felt that very strongly in weeks past, and still do sometimes as we do not plan on having a second child. I will miss pregnancy always. It was an amazing time in my life. I think I said somewhere before that what I long for is not so much being pregnant a second time, but rather being pregnant with Wes all over again, especially now that I know him so well and love him so much.

    Stay strong mama!

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  3. You put into words thoughts I had but couldn't put into words. Thank you. Lydia used to kick inside during hymns at church, and when we brought her the first time at 8 days old, I was sad when we stood to sing a hymn and I *realized* I wouldn't feel her kicking. But I wouldn't trade her for the kick, no way no how.

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  4. I know exactly how you feel! I never particularly enjoyed being pregnant, but now I kind of miss it. When my little man kicks or hiccups now, I'm reminded of how he used to do that in my tummy.

    Look at how beautiful your bundle of joy is! =)

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