Baby C’s due date was November 5, 2011. But as early as mid-October, I had a feeling
that she wasn't going to wait until her due date to show up. My pregnancy had been fairly easy but it was
definitely different than Little G's. I
had very intense Braxton Hicks contractions with Baby C that centered well
below my belly. Little G's were mostly
the kind that washed over my belly in comparison. Probably the biggest difference in my second
pregnancy was that I had some very severe pain in my groin which ended up being
SPD, or Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction. Basically
it means that your body is releasing hormones that are causing your pelvis to
start to separate in preparation for having a baby. While it was nice to know my body was ready
to give birth, it was excruciatingly painful.
The Braxton Hicks contractions were very intense the week
prior to having Baby C and I was as positive as I could be that she was
coming within the week…of course, I couldn’t really know…but I couldn’t imagine her NOT coming early. On the Friday before she was born, I had an
OB appointment and I wasn’t surprised to hear that I was already 2cm dilated. My OB suggested I take it easy over the next
few days since he was going out of town and wanted to make sure that I didn’t
give birth while he was away! Sadly,
that wasn’t to be as the very next day we had our maternity picture session
scheduled to shoot.
We gathered with our friends and the photographer at the Arboretum
on Saturday morning to take pictures and then afterwards we all headed to the
Franklin Park Zoo…so instead of sitting and resting I was on my feet from 9
until 2pm that day…oops. Not much happened
after the zoo, though, so who knows if it had anything to do with my labor
starting early.
The next Thursday morning, October 27, I woke up around 3:30
in the morning and realized I had been having pretty steady contractions that
were coming every ten minutes. I started
tracking them on my iPhone at 4:50am and texted my doula an hour
later:
10/27/2011 5:47am
Me:
Hi there...pretty sure labor has started. Contractions every 10 min for past 90
min. Hubs will take G to daycare at 7 and then swing by work to pick up some
stuff. Should be back by 9. Any ideas on when you should come over? Feel free
to call. We're up.
The Doula:
How intense are things feeling? And how long are they lasting? As long as
they mild and manageable and spaced to 10 minutes we will call it on the early
side. When they get closer, longer and a bit stronger I could make my way.
Me:
They're pretty intense and just short of a minute each (thanks to my handy
iPhone tracker app). Haven't gotten out of bed though...cause I'm warm and comfy.
Should I do that to see if they change? Also, may have potentially broken water
but really not sure. Barely a trickle if that
The Doula:
No problem to stay in bed! They may be more managable if you are not lying down
but if you are comfy let's go with it! Get up when you feel so inclined and we
shall see how/if they change.
Me:
Hubs would like me to ask if you think this is the beginning of labor :)
The Doula:
Yes! I would say you are in early labor
The Doula:
Let's see what the next few hours bring and touch base again
Me:
ok
My contractions kept consistently coming faster with a few
random ones thrown in that were a bit longer in frequency. By 8:00 in the morning, I was getting down to
every 6-8 minutes and by 8:30 I had had several at a frequency of only every 4-6
minutes. We had already
called/emailed/texted the support team we had put in place for Little G logistics. They figured out amongst
themselves who would bring Little G home from daycare, who would meet him at
the house, who would get him dinner and who would stay overnight with him based
on their various work schedules. So we
started to gather our things to go to the hospital and I continued to track my
contractions. But over the next hour
they spaced out again to every 6-8 minutes.
From 9:30 – 10:30 they were every 9-11 minutes. By noon time, they were only every half
hour. I called our doula pretty much
devastated because I was convinced I had broken my labor. Since I didn’t go into labor naturally with
Little G, I had no idea if what I had been experiencing was real or not and I
was so disappointed and discouraged. I
also felt ashamed (and I admit that it was silly to feel this way) that I had
posted on Facebook that we were going to have a baby that day and I had gotten
our Little G-back-up-team all in a tizzy and it seemed like things were really
slowing down. Could I have been in false
labor? Did I have days, possibly weeks
left to go?
Our doula assured me that it was very ‘normal’ for labor to
slow down sometimes in the middle. I
hadn’t broken anything. She explained
that sometimes our bodies quiet things down in preparation for all of the work
that we’re going to have to do later.
She suggested that we sit tight, watch a movie and relax a little bit. She also suggested that if we wanted to see
if we could move labor along, we could try nipple stimulation and/or try
intercourse. The most important thing
she mentioned doing was trying to get my mind off of my stalled labor. So I did what any
crazy-pants-lady-in-stalled-labor would do…I made a pork belly roast! To be fair, my labor was really stalled and I
had taken out two pork bellies earlier in the week with the intent of braising
them and they HAD to be made that day or we would lose them…so I figured I
would start cooking them since we’d either get to enjoy them, or have to throw
them out because they either went bad in the refrigerator or because I had to
abort cooking them halfway through to go to the hospital and have a baby.
After throwing the roast in the oven, my husband and I sat down
to watch a movie, “Horrible Bosses”…which was a pretty horrible movie. Pretty soon it was time to pick up Little G from daycare. I didn’t have anything
else to do, so I went along for the ride, having called off the troops for the
time being. On our way to pick up
Little G, my husband asked me what I wanted to do for dinner and I looked at him and
said that I wanted to share the roast pork belly with our friends. So my husband sent out an email to our support
team letting them know we had a HUGE amount of braised pork belly ready to eat
in our house and that I wanted nothing more than to be surrounded by good
friends while my labor was stalled.
We got back from picking up Little G and pretty soon our
neighbors showed up with their two little ones. Little G's Godmother showed up next. I finished off the pork belly by
broiling it to get it extra crispy and added some chopped cabbage to round out
the dish and eventually served it up to everyone. From 6:00 – 7:00, while everyone was over
having dinner, my contractions finally ramped up again and averaged every 8-11
minutes. We said goodbye to our neighbors
since it was bed time for their kids and Little G's Godmother stayed, insisting that she was
going to stay overnight to be with Little G if we headed to the hospital. We put Little G to sleep and over the next
hour my contractions went down again to every 10-12 minutes.
It was now 8:00pm and we called our doula again to let her
know that things were ramping up again.
I decided that I wanted to try getting in our tub to labor but I quickly
realized that was NOT a position for me.
I am sure it would work great if we had a super big tub and I was a
smaller person…but as it was, I was wedged into a cold, iron tub and barely
able to lay down even with my legs fully bent.
It was the opposite of comfortable even if I hadn’t been in labor. I had one contraction while in the tub and
decided that was enough of that so instead I had my husband unwedge me from my
uncomfortable position and help me stand up so I could take a shower. Now THAT felt good. It was super hot and very comforting, but
eventually, I started to prune so I decided it was time to get out.
It was now close to 9:00pm and my contractions had been
every 5-7 minutes apart so we called our doula again and asked her to come over
to our home. In the meantime, my husband started getting things in the car and ready for when she arrived. I settled down into a chair in our living
room and sat there listening to the music on my iPod that I had made into a
soothing playlist way back when Little G was born. My contractions were getting VERY intense,
but were still not consistently 5 minutes apart. My husband asked my permission to go upstairs and
take a quick shower before our doula got there and I told him to go, but go
quickly. While he was gone, I ended up
having two major contractions that could only have been 5 minutes apart. I know this because I exclaimed during the
second one that my husband was taking the “World’ Most F*cking Long Shower”, but I
was told afterwards by Little G's Godmother (who was quietly
knitting on our couch through the whole process) that my husband was literally only
gone for 5 minutes AND he had shaved…making it quite possibly the world’s shortest shower.
A few minutes after my husband came back downstairs, our doula arrived at our house. I had a few
contractions while she was at the house and it was so great to have her there
to help me release the tension I was holding in my shoulders and remind me to
breathe through the contractions. We
started discussing going to the hospital and I decided that I wanted to go
sooner than later because I knew there were a lot of things that would need to
get done before I could settle in and focus on having a baby. I kept saying, “We’ll need to park the car,
get out of the car, walk in, explain who we are, fill out the paper work, talk
to the anesthesiologist even though I don’t want an epidural, get an IV, etc.” My husband pointed out that the only thing I
needed to do in all of that list of things was get-out-of-the-car and he would
take care of the rest. But still, we decided
it was a good time to go. As instructed
by my OB, we called his answering service to let them know we were on the way
to the hospital. At that point it was
around 10:00pm and things were now in the 4-5 minute range. It was also snowing outside, so I thought we should
take our Volvo because it is a safer car…but then I started to feel a bit nauseous,
so I quickly suggested we take my husband’s rickety old VW Jetta instead.
We headed out the door and to the car. I was wearing my pajamas, a huge
sweatshirt-material robe and rubber boots (because it was snowing). Our doula sat in the back and coached me
through the contractions while we drove the 25 minutes to the hospital. I have to give my husband major credit here
because there was SO much fog on the windows from my heavy breathing that he
could barely see and he managed to miss most of the potholes on the way to the
hospital. While in the car, I had two
contractions that were double contractions; meaning that they ramped up and
started to come down and then stalled and went up again before coming
down. In hindsight, we now know that I
went through transition in the car in those two contractions. We got to the hospital and headed to the ER
because we didn’t realize that the maternity check-in area was open until
midnight. I had another awful
contraction while getting out of the car and I remember crying to my husband and
telling him that I didn’t want a baby anymore.
He reminded me that I just had to get through the contraction I was
having and to just focus on that. Our doula and I headed into the hospital and my husband went back outside to get all of our
stuff out of the car before the Valet could take it away. At that moment, I had another contraction and
decided that since I was at the hospital I was no longer going to track them on
my iPhone like I had been doing all day, so I slammed my iPhone on the counter in protest.
An orderly helped me get into a wheel chair and then rolled
me all the way to Labor and Delivery. It
was a least a five minute walk and he was BOOKING it! Our doula was practically running next to him
as he raced through the hallways. When
we got to Labor and Delivery, it was very quiet and there were three nurses at
the station and they all looked up at me and one said, “Who are you?” Apparently the answering service had never
called the hospital to let them know I was on the way!! I looked at the nurses and very calmly said, “My name is --- ------. My OB is Dr. ------. I am in labor and I would like to take off my
boots and I would like some warm slippers.
I would also like my husband.”
The nurses were all pretty slow in my mind, but in
hindsight, they had no idea how far along in my labor I was and I was acting
pretty rational…not at all like a person who is about to actually give
birth. One nurse took me into a delivery
room and handed me a gown and told me to change into it. I went into the bathroom and changed into the
gown but for some reason didn’t remove my underwear. As I came out of the bathroom, my husband finally
showed up. The nurse wanted me to get on
the bed so she could put the fetal monitor on me and I hesitated because I didn’t
want to be tethered to the monitor for my whole labor. Our doula and my husband pointed out that they
needed to monitor the baby for just a little bit so they could know what my
status was.
I sat down on the bed and the nurse asked me where my baby’s
heartbeat usually was found and I pointed it out to her and she found it right
away. It was about 11:00ish and someone
casually asked if I was going to have a baby today or tomorrow. I said I had no idea. I mention this because I feel like that
moment right there was the only moment of relative calm in the entire time I
was in Labor and Delivery! Not long
after that moment, I felt another contraction coming on and I sat up on the
side of the bed. Mid-contraction, I felt a pop, almost what seemed to be a baby kick but it was way lower than any kicking baby had
ever kicked me before. Immediately after
that, my water broke and literally gushed all over the side of the bed. A few moments later the Resident on call came
into the room and checked my cervix while I was sitting at the side of the
bed. I was 8cm dilated, 100% effaced but
at 0 station. To have a baby, you have
to be at 10 cm dilated and +3 station.
The latter of which is a measurement of where the baby is in relation to
the birth canal and your pelvis. To
quote the doctor, “the baby’s still pretty high up there”.
The Doctor left and not long after that I had another
contraction while sitting on the side of the bed. Toward the end of the contraction I felt the
most intense need to push and I said, “I have to push”. But then the contraction ended. Our doula looked at one of the nurses and
said, “She’s talking about pushing, can you get the Doctor?” Since the contraction was over, the nurses
were trying to get me into a new gown but I only got it halfway on when I
started to have another massive contraction.
This time, I HAD to push…I couldn’t stop. The nurses were all saying, “DON’T PUSH” and
in my head I was thinking I was only at 8cm, and you can’t have a baby until 10
cm, so clearly I was going to completely rupture my body in some way if I
pushed…but I couldn’t stop it from happening.
I pushed and the baby’s head was crowning. our doula called my husband over to where she was
standing because you could see the baby
(he had been standing in front of me helping to hold me up). I felt the ring of fire and knew that our
baby was coming. I tried to crouch down
instinctively and someone said, “Don’t Sit!!
You’ll sit on her head!!” but I was just trying to crouch. With one massive push, I pushed our baby girl
out of my body just as the Doctor was running into the room to catch her before
hitting the floor! There was a massive
gush of body fluids all over the place.
It was 11:12pm; only 35 minutes after arriving at the hospital and
within 20 minutes of getting into my hospital gown.
They helped me lay down on the bed so I could deliver the
placenta at that point and they put my feet in the stirrups. Because my body had delivered so quickly, it
was still in transition and all of the hormones and adrenaline were still
rushing through my body. As I lay there,
my body was convulsing out of control and it was one of the freakiest things I
have ever seen. I cannot express enough
how glad I was to have our doula there with me to explain all of the things
that were going on with my body. While
this was going on, my husband was with Baby C as she got cleaned up and got her
Vitamin K drops. They weighed and
measured her at 10 pounds, 4.8oz (only .2 oz less than Little G) and 21.25
inches long (only .25 inches shorter than Little G).
Because I gave birth standing up, I had less of a tear than
I had with Little G and generally was in better condition. This time, I got a local while the Doctor
stitched me up but it was difficult to focus on what she was doing anyway
because my body was shaking uncontrollably.
Eventually, things calmed down and the doctor finished stitching me
up. We spent the next hour or so in the
labor and delivery room answering all of the questions and filling out all of
the forms that we should have filled out prior to having the baby including finally getting my hospital bracelet!
The birth of our daughter was the most intense and chaotic
moment of my life. When our son was
born, I was enamored with him and the process.
We had worked together to birth him and I felt like we were a team
together. But with my daughter, there
was no time to bond like that. It was
fast and furious and anything but deeply meaningful*. But it was still a beautiful birth and I am
so incredibly proud of my body for birthing our daughter in such a spectacular
way.
-----
If you haven't already read it and are interested in doing so... you can find the birth story of our son, Little G, here:
http://www.otherpiecesofme.com/2009/08/birth-story-of-our-son-07-08-09.html.
--
Here are some recent pictures of Ladybug (her official blog moniker) at 8 months:
--
* When I first wrote this story, just a few weeks after the Ladybug was born, I definitely felt removed from her birth. The experience had been incredibly chaotic and there was no time for deep meaning. I can confirm that 8 months after her birth, I look back at the events of that day and it is incredibly meaningful to me. More than ever, I feel like she and I were (and are) a team and her birth was her way of getting to me as quickly as possible. I spoke with my doula not long after her birth and we talked about how removed I felt at the time from the experience. It turns out that isn't too uncommon for fast births. I wrote a bit more about that, as well as some other birth story thoughts in the following series:
Some Thoughts on My Birthing Experience
- On Braxton Hicks vs. Real Contractions
- On Symphosis Pubis Dysfunction or SPD
Some More Thoughts on my Birthing Experience
- On Getting to the Hospital and Fearing the Nurses Didn't Believe I Was in Labor
- On Taking More Time to Bond With My Daughter After a Fast Birth
Some Final Thoughts on my Birthing Experience
- On Gratitude and Our Support Team
- On My Contractions Timing App
- On Working With a Doula for a Second Birth
also
If you haven't already read it and are interested in doing so... you can find the birth story of our son, Little G, (and the famed placenta picture) here:
Birth Story of Our Son 07-08-09.
