Friday, October 21, 2011

I'm too sexy for my car

Did you know I drive a muscle car?

Ok...not really.  I mean...I AM currently driving one...but it is a rental.

You see, about a month ago, I was leaving the parking lot from my pre-natal massage appointment all relaxed and mellow and zen and ran right into another car.  The damage wasn't too bad...I was going to a total of 2.5 MPH and the other car was parked, but still.  Ouch.

Oh yeah...I am sooooo cool.

Since we had a little bit of time before the baby's due date, we decided it was a good idea to get the car fixed.  So now, I have been the proud driver of a 2010 Silver Dodge Charger for the past two weeks.  I have a few things to say.

I hate this car.

It was the biggest one available in my insurance company's this-is-what-we'll-cover-daily-rental-allotment, so I chose it over a dinky looking Chevy.  But yeah...I hate this car.

The car is annoying for a bazillion reasons; it guzzles gas; the transmission is whacked; getting my 33 lb two year old into the carseat in the back through the 4" of space left between the seat and the car and NOT pulling a major muscle or going into labor is next to impossible.

But, my biggest grievance is that the windshield is ridiculously small.  As in, I ride with the seat all the way back because I have crazy-long legs and the roof of the car comes so far forward that in order to see a traffic light while stopped in front of it I need to lean all the way forward and look up.  Which would would be annoying if I wasn't pregnant, but is downright impossible at the moment.

The car is so oppressively confining that even Little G got in it for the first time and said excitedly, "We're in a tunnel!!"

My friend pointed out to me that I probably wouldn't have as much of an issue seeing the traffic lights if I drove the car in the proper muscle-car seat alignment...i.e. if I had the back of the seat reclined and drove with one hand like a low rider.

And I actually see her point as I have witnessed a few people driving their Dodge Chargers in such a manner.  The problem is, and I hate to be a stickler on this, I would never. get. out. Like...never.  As in, I would birth my child in the car just so I could get up.

However, it is sexy.  And really, what could be better for my self esteem than crawling out of a muscle car 38 weeks pregnant with my hands on my back and my ass in the air.



  1. What is your usual car? I'm not a fan of the charger either, we had one as a rental too and hated it!

  2. LOL! Sorry your car sucks--when will you get your normal car back?

  3. Usually I drive a Volvo XC60...which while definitely a mom car, does have SOME sex appeal...according to the Twilight series on Film which featured Edward (I think) traipsing around his enchanted forest in an XC60 in one of the movies.

  4. Should be back by this Friday.  FWIW, baby girl is due NEXT a whole week after that...but I don't think she's a gonna make it.

    Time to load up the infant seat in the back o' that thang!